The Hand That Rocks The Cradle (2025) - Lazy Cash Grab - REVIEW

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skiptvads3 months ago8 min read

The Hand That Rocks the Cradle 2025 just dropped on Hulu a couple of days ago, I CAN NOT RECOMMEND this one, this is the type of script that Maika Monroe should know to just walk away, she does have a few movies I like, there is "It Follows (2014)" and most recent "Longlegs (2024)" and after sitting through this thing I got to say it feels like one of those remakes nobody really wanted, you know what I mean. The original back in 1992 had Rebecca De Mornay doing her thing as this psycho nanny and people still enjoy the drama out of that movie today because it worked, it had real tension, real scares and that whole evil woman moving into your house vibe was perfect. This new version directed by Michelle Garza Cervera tries to do something different, witch I can respect because we are in the era of lets reboot every movie from the 80s and 90s under the sun and call it "not a remake" so they add their own sauce to it and Im all in for that but honestly it just does not land the same way this time, not even close. Its got Mary Elizabeth Winstead and Maika Monroe in the lead roles and there both solid actors, no complaints about the performances but the script feels super lazy and you can see most of the twists coming from a mile away, its like most Fatal Attraction inspired movie, you already know wth going to happen but there are some that as I said at their own sauce and works, but this one just ruins all the suspense been so obvious and predictable.

IMDB: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt33502160
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The pacing drags hard in spots where it should be building tension but instead your just sitting there waiting for something interesting to happen and it takes forever. They tried adding this modern spin with queer themes and social commentary stuff that had some potential, but it comes off forced and does not add much to the story. So the basic setup is what you expect from these nanny from hell movies, Caitlin played by Winstead is this uptight pregnant attorney who represents clients in housing disputes. She meets this woman Polly played by Monroe they first meet when Caitlin is assigned to represent Polly as her attorney in a housing dispute with her landlord, then they cross paths again at the farmers market where Polly asks for the nanny job. From the start you can tell something is way off with Polly, shes got this dead look in her eyes and says weird shit that should be red flags, but everyone ignores it because the script needs them to act like sheep and just go with the expected flow.

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Monroe does her best with what she was given, and she brings that creepy energy, she was doing something with her performance that gives you chills but its not Rebecca De Mornay level, nobody here is on that level honestly. Winstead plays Caitlin as this super controlling type A mom who freaks out about everything, she is obsessed with what her kids eat, staying fit and micromanaging every aspect of her familys life, witch makes her annoying to watch I guess that was good to a certain point because the movie is making you feel at least something but then there is nothing that tame her down, nothing in contrast to keep things balance. The husband Miguel played by Raul Castillo is my biggest issue with this movie because this dude is the weakest, most spineless character I have seen in forever. Every time Caitlin tries to tell him something is wrong with Polly, he brushes her off, acts like she is paranoid, even when she has legit concerns, he is like nah your crazy and it gets frustrating watching it play out. I get the movie is showing maritial problems and how Polly uses that against them but damn this guy needed to have his wifes back once. There was a scene where the nanny gives there 10 year old daughter fireworks and the kid almost blows her hands off in her bedroom and Miguels response is basically well you hired her, like are you serious, your daughter almost got hurt bad and your defending the nanny, it makes no sense. The script tries giving him depth by making him Mexican, throwing in lines about feeling like an outsider but it goes nowhere, its just there to check boxes. The mystery of why Pollys doing this takes forever to get revealed and when it happens, its not terrible, turns out Caitlin used to be named Jennifer as a teenager.

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She burned down Pollys family house killing everyone except Polly, because Pollys dad was sexually abusing both Jennifer and his own daughter for years and nobody believed Jennifer, so she changed her name and moved on, while Polly grew up in foster care plotting revenge for like 30 years and some change, its dark as hell, worse than the original motivation. But the movie does not do enough with it, by the time you find out you are like men its too late for surprises because after that the movie feels like its over there is nothing to carry the momentum because the pacing dragged so long and nothing shocking happened to keep you interested enough. Polly spends most the movie doing small sabotage like switching Caitlyns meds with meth, adding sugar to the kids food, starting little fires, witch feels tame compared to the original. There was also this thing where Polly might be attracted to Caitlin , because Caitlyns bisexual and that adds psychological manipulation that could of been interesting and they could have added some kind of obsession potentially sexual to mix things up but I guess then wanted to stick to the original story, but the movie does not commit to be revolutionary or changes things up, it teases it then drops it.

The supporting characters are useless, there is this guy Stewart whos Caitlyns neighbor, supposed to be the suspicious friend like Julianne Moore in the original, he had this fishy suspicious about Polly for living in Boyle Heights a lower income area, a bit racist if you ask me but since its Polly I wasnt going to rain on his show although its his execution that was weak. Then he investigates Polly by breaking into her room, stealing her trash to do a DNA test with her used tampon and soda can, first who does that, second why confront her alone instead of calling cops. Stewart had it coming for been that type of idiot so as expected Polly beats him to death with a bat and thats the only kill in the movie, pretty weak. The ending is rushed as hell, that is where it falls apart, Caitlin confronts Polly at the house, they fight, Polly stabs her with broken glass, but Caitlin grabs her baby and jumps in her car. Polly jumps on the windshield with a hammer trying to smash through, then comes in this missing stop sign from earlier in the movie that Caitlin use to freak out about, that comes into play as she just goes into incoming traffic and I think it was a lady in a Land Rover runs it and slams into Caitlyns car sending Polly flying through the air. Its hilarious watching her body spin and land mangled with her arm twisted wrong, its the most entertaining part but it happens fast, then its just over. Miguel shows up after walking slow from a softball game and thats it, no resolution, lights come on, gladly this is not a theater movie because there would be torches and pitch forks raise. I would give this a out of 10, Winstead and Monroe try there best, theres some decent moments but it could of been way better if they committed to darker themes and gave us a real third act.