Ego Wants to Win. Humility Wants to Understand.
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Most arguments don’t begin because we want the truth.
They begin because we want to be right.
Ego has a loud voice. It rushes in before the other person has finished speaking. It sharpens words into weapons and keeps score like a game...who won, who lost, who proved what. Ego feels powerful in the moment, but strangely empty afterward. The debate ends, yet something inside remains unsettled.
Humility is quieter. It listens more than it speaks. It pauses. It asks, What am I missing? Humility doesn’t feel the need to defeat another person to feel whole. It understands that every human carries a story, and every opinion grows from lived experience.
Ego builds walls.
Humility builds doors.
When ego leads, conversations turn into battles. Hearts close. Defenses rise. We stop hearing and start preparing our next attack. Understanding becomes impossible because winning has already been decided as the goal.
When humility leads, something softer happens. We may still disagree, but we remain connected. We allow space for another truth to exist beside our own. In that space, learning happens. Healing happens.
Spiritual growth is not about proving how awakened we are. It is about noticing when our ego wants to speak.... and choosing silence instead. It is about letting go of the hunger to be superior and choosing the courage to be open.
The soul does not need trophies.
It needs clarity.
Winning a debate may feed the ego for a moment. Gaining understanding feeds the heart for a lifetime.
I guess some of the best conversations aren’t the ones we win, but the ones that leave us a little quieter afterward.
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